Do it gently,please...

Maybe I have known it was not going to last long.

Still, I hold on to it.

One night, I had a dream. My friend was being dumped by his lover.Let's call my friend is A and his lover is B.

Well,as a good friend,I tried to reason.But in the end, what really happened was ugly.Because in their relationship I saw mine.

"Even if you wanted to dump him,at least do it gently!"

A was the same as me.That time,if he wanted a break up,do it properly.If not,I will hold on to it,even if it shatters me apart.

But of course,with him,I finally established my personality well.

I shouldn't keep my hopes up,so I won't have a broken heart that cannot be healed in the future.

I should be ready to get dumped,rather than clinging on something that surely will disappear.

If my feelings for him doesn't change,it'll be harder  for me to let go.

And that's what exactly happened.I have a good lad waiting for me to be his lifetime partner,Mohammad Mursyidi b.Osman, but still...

It was stupid,and it was crazy..yet,being stupid was the only way. I already lost him in reality, let he be mine in my dream.

The only thing that is different is HE told me doesn't want me,but with A...

The bastard just left..without a word.Not a single word uttering "Let's breakup."

Can anyone be more evil than that?

All this time,I've been waiting for a reply.A word of farewell.All this time..

me:How could you??
B:A isn't a girl.He can live.
me:But still...you could have dumped him gently!!Not running away without a single word!
B:I think it was for the best.

And all I could remember was a guy behind me,whispering words that made me hate myself.The same voice that comforts me all the time,belonging to a man who gave me the nickname,..

"Velvet,the words you're saying to B was actually the words you wanted to tell HIM right?"

                                       Being hopelessly in love,was the previous me.Not the present me.