Today, a new chapter, the first one.

Walaupun secara literalnya memang aku berazam untuk lepaskan apa yang dah berlaku & cuba buka cerita baru dalam hidup, hari ni agak "lively" lah boleh dikatakan.

BM-Encik Asri mungkin berbual sebab nak lebih rapat dengan student die,walaupun topik kitorang agak "intimate" dan "sensitif".Maksud aku kenapa la dia nak bual pasal kisah cinta aku??Tapi in the end,bende ni jadi bahan lawak Dila ngan Saba. "Bini ke-2 Encik Asri" katenye..

Taklimat PBS- well,selain aku & Said datang lewat,takde apa sangat kot.

Tapi benda ni cukup untuk permulaan.

"A laugh a day keeps the bad memory away" - me

Future

Been thinking about grieves and pain only.
Wasn't able to look the bright side of it.
If ALLAH SWT says "no", it means HE have something better restored.
Because of stubbornness,because of being selfish,egocentric and too childish..
Time will help in healing process,family is always there,friends will support the falling tears,
and mostly RELIGION will make the heart clean.
It's no use running away anymore.
It's no use holding on if it hurts.
It's no use to cry over things that will never be mine.

I'm starting my new chapter in life.
Now.
From this moment on,I will only rely on HIM.
HE who created me,
HE who gave me everything in life,
and HE whom I pray to.

"Sayang macam mana pun, kalau Allah tak kasi,takkan jadi. Follow the flow,but never get caught in the waves,you might drown my love."        - Puan Noorliza Md Nor.

Brendan Fraser

Yeaaaah, another post.
Hahahaha...
Okay, I REALLY shouldn't be doing this when I already promised myself this morning that I would search things for my KKP.

I WILL do it.Only a little bit longer.

*sigh*, I am being more and more lazier than ever.

Not only my IQ has degraded to a 10-year old, I have "work-issue" called LAZINESS.

Today has been numerous posts on Fesbuk and Twitter about Lee Chong Wei lost to Lin Dan.
Was it only me who doesn't care about this thing?
I mean, he lost.
Get over it.
Not like it's the end of the world.
Duuh.,..

One person used to tell me to get a book on "Anger Management", and I replied "I won't have to if people can manage their stupidity".

Yes, that is how I perceive people.

Now, move to our MAIN TOPIC.

My delicious, hunky, handsome, beautiful, purrrfect BRENDAN FRASER~!!!

Pic from The Mummy 1st

I loved him since I watched The Mummy.
And when I watched The Mummy Returns & The Mummy 3:Tomb of The Dragon,
I fell in love all over again~~
*swoon with eternal happiness*
His looks never really age.
He has this I-am-hot-and-protective-but-a-nice-nerd-funny-guy-also aura within him.
He and Rachel Weisz had a great chemistry.

I also watched George of The Jungle but his dorkiness was shadowed by his hotness.
George supposed to be stupid, but I look at him and all I feel is "hot hot hot half-naked Brendan!"
Okay,I'm not as innocent as I look.
Hahahahaha...

Time to off blog and Twitter, start searching for KKP thingys.
*DON!*

Sungkai Talk

Today will mark as the last day of this week I will break the fast with me familia.

And at the dinner table, Bonda suddenly open the talk of the names in Ayahanda's family.

"Dalam famili Abah, Abah ngan Cik Ninie ja yang takde huruf M dalam nama Abah".

Wan Mohd Nor
Wan Mohd Zulkifli
Wan Marno
Wan Maidi
Wan Yahya
Wan Maizan
Wan Noor Aini
Wan Marina
Wan Mohd Ridwan
Wan Mohd Iqbal
Wan Maharam
Wan Mahathir
Wan Alias

p/s: tak ikut turutan nama-nama nih..hahaha

Pastu Bonda cakap mungkin sebab tu pakcik-pakcik kitorang percayakan Abah untuk pegang harta tanah arwah Tok Wan.

Abah pulak cakap Tok Wan ambik nama Abah sempena Sultan Kelantan, Sultan Yahya melawat Pasir Mas.

The funny thing is, Abah cakap,
"Kalau Abah warisi kekayaan Sultan Yahya tak pe, ni Abah warisi kelembapan dia jah."

Memang tak bley blah.

Umi plak cakap nasib baik Abah tak warisi fizikal Sultan Yahya; Gemuk & putih melepak.

What a weird family I have.

what,.,..WHAT????

Okay,I am totally clueless.

Last night Adinda told me something I CAN'T comprehend.
She said,
"Along, be prepared. Nii-chan* will tell you something one day."

*Nii-chan=big bro , she called Syidi that.


And I was like, "WTF???"

Did she tell him something SHE SHOULDN'T??
Like how pathetic I am???
How stupid I got (and look) while still whining over him???

Did she contacted him while I was at home??
OhMai...

Wait, you did WHAT????!!! CONTACTED YOUR ONII-CHAN???

Oh God, oh Good Lord....

And what if all he wanted to say to me is like,

"I don't love you anymore.You need a life."

I don't wanna hear that, I won't hear that!!

Maybe I should re-new my passport and run far far away????

I don't want to confront this.

I'm too much of a coward.

At Saturday night, while I was at kitchen making Sahur's food,
she was on phone.
I thought she was talking to her (boy?)friend,
So I let her be.

Then,
When I entered the room,
She became all angsty and told me to prepare myself to confront her FAVOURITE Onii-chan.
They're coming to get me..

Oh Good God...
I seriously need to change my name, make a plastic surgery and run away to another country.

Time Limit

Sometimes what I say and what I do contrast with each other.
No,most of the time.

But thinking about what I have said,
it's too much of a burden to start with a blast.

So I was thinking about setting a time limit.
I will do as Saba says.
I will wait.
It won't hurt,right?
After all, I'm not alone in this world (though I've chosen to be alone),
And in the end,
All that matter is,
Both of us are happy.
With or without each other.
Time will tell.

My time limit in waiting is until Hari Raya Aidil Fitri.
If  up until that time,
Nothing has changed,
No one did anything,
So be it.

I have to start a new chapitre on my life.
Time to close that old chapter.
No one likes to see an up-hanged ending.

But insyaAllah if something DID happen before times up,
I will hold on.
Because I only have two options;
Start a new chapter TOGETHER,
or start a new chapter alone.

Allah SWT has restored the best for me,insyaALLAH.
Giving up is too mainstream, so I'm going to do both.
I probably love him THAT much.

Done.

Probably he doesn't understand.
Probably he doesn't WANT to understand.
But most likely....he doesn't even care anymore.
I was the only idiot here.
The biggest idiot.
Hoping, crying, regretting,..
This I'm sure will only lead to another frustration.
But I still haven't get over him.

What should I do?

I'm done being the only one holding on to something that doesn't exist anymore.
I used to say,
"I want him, but I want him to want me".

And another heartbreak.

Now I only want an escapade,
I'm done waiting.
I need a new life.

And I need to start accepting that my future most likely won't involve him.

What You Did, You Get Back.

As the title screams my wrongdoings,
Yes,
The truth hurts.
But it's also true.
Now I feel what he felt.

WHY DID I BECAME SO STUPID?
WHY DID I HURT SOMEONE WHO LOVED ME?

Because I am not a good person.

Kun Faya Kun.

I've waited for 6 months.
A little more years won't hurt,will it?

But please....
please..
notice me.
Notice my cries.
Notice my agonies.
Notice my pains.
Because all I've been doing was looking at your back.

If I had another chance,
I won't let go.
I won't have uneasiness.
I won't mistrust you.
I'll hold on.
That is my promise.