If It's About Survival

If it's about survival, isn't a little agony worth it?

"There's something wrong here. Something wrong with the way you bring yourself."
"Yeah, it's the evident of insanity."

Everyone has it, but no one can lose it. What is it? What is it?
I DON'T KNOW!!!
"A shadow, Vet."

Lately I've been waking up and forgetting who I am.
Sometimes I forgot to eat,
And it escalates to the point where sleep is also forgotten.
If you look too close you'll see my hallways are full of caution signs.

I'd be good at drowning.

I used to think that the worst feeling in the world was losing someone you loved,
But I was wrong.

The worst feeling is the moment that you realize,
You've lost yourself.

Am I losing the war?
Have I gone deep beneath the abyss?
If you're drowning, 
And you're trying to keep your mouth closed until that very last moment,
What if you choose to not open your mouth?
More time to fight your way to the surface?
More time to be rescued?
More time to be in agonizing pain.
You'd do it anyway, it's gag reflex.

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