A Little Thought On Anthropology

Multitude.

Some people has their unique quality that differs them from others.
Some are extroverts,
Some introverts,
Some a little bit of both,
And then there are maniacs.

I take times to observe what I am,
What kind of people I socialize,
What kind of people I avoid,
Humans in general.

I like watching how they bring themselves,
How they interact with others,
Just because I'm simply curious.

Watching them doesn't bring benefits for me,
Because I have nothing that I could manipulate or extract from them.
I'm not a sociopath.

Usually I keep to myself what I see in people,
There is nothing to say,
And nothing to memorize.

As I grow older,
The company I keep,
And the intrapersonal skills that I have,
Baffled me to no end,
Until now.

I learned from experience that sometimes I share too much background information,
So sometimes I filtered it,
Or just omit the facts,
Replace it by something else.

I don't lie,
I just don't tell the truth.

Socializing with a sociopath makes me think,
That sometimes I am a masochist,
For abiding by his words and reluctantly debates with him,
To stand up for my principle.

And some other times I think his sociopathic traits rub off on me.
Like masking my own antisocial self to blend in,
Mimicking people's reactions so I would seem normal.

Mingling with people of my own gender taught me about feminism,
And arguing on how to treat myself and different gender normally.

Someone who is fairly perceptive of my own person told me that I am a peculiarity.
A mix of sociopath, introvert, depression, and something new.
While he psychoanalyzes me,
I think that it is fair for me to ostracizes his thoughts by giving me information,
Helping me to understand me better.

A sociopath never feels guilty of committing an immoral act.
So the depressed can never be a sociopath.
But I have both qualities.

So what am I?

And the mindset of playing with humans,
Emotionally and socially,
Even when I am not aware of it,
Is something new, he says.

Being bored of people after using them is a sociopathic trait.
But as I am easily bored with people,
I don't use them for personal entertainment per se.
I don't enjoy crushing people's hearts and leave them broken.
But I don't feel sympathetic nor empathetic about it.

I don't understand when my friends keep feeling pity about something,
Because I don't feel their sentiments,
I only care about what I feel.

Because it happens every day,
To everyone.

So I nod and agrees to everything,
Because I am lazy to argue anymore.
Unless it excites me so,
Or the topic intrigued me.

I'd like to see if the people I'm socializing with have different views on themselves.
Or what I see is what I intercept.