Their Vows - Lips As Sweet As Raspberry Wine

"From the day I met you, you infuriated me. I've heard from numerous sources in my life that you only get really pissed at the people you love the most. From day one, I have been lost to you. Everything you are, is everything I am, everything I want and everything I hope to be. From the first time I saw you, I forgot what it was like to live without you. From the first time you kissed me, I never wanted to know again. From this day on, I am yours, body and soul. I will love you, protect you, fight with you and for you. I will die for you if it comes to that. I vow from this day forward I will not know what it is like to live without you. If your last day should come before mine, I will make it mine as well." - Stiles Stilinski

"Lips as sweet as raspberry wine, I'm drunk on your whiskey eyes when they look into mine. Sometimes I don't know what I'm going to do. I never knew love, until I knew you. You are the beginning and you are the end. I never want to live without you ever again. To love and to protect, to keep and to respect. You are forever and I will follow you wherever. Because there's nothing I want more than to stay drunk in your eyes and never say goodbye." - Derek Hale

A Sterek wedding!! It's a fangirl dream came true.

The Dark Side of The Moon?

It is hard to find people who accept who you are.
And it is harder to accept other people's inability to accept who you are.
Two words:
One,
You both change for the best of both worlds.
Two,
Just accept.
Why does it seems like no one other than my sister and Amir can accept THE REAL ME?
Maybe because I reject other people too.
So they reciprocate.

I still can't find one who can.

Maybe no one can.

Feels like wailing my heart out.
Stupidity gets the best of me, though.

everything is wrong.

Nothing is right.

It'll Always Be Him

This seemed like a Déjà vu.
It'll always come back to him.
Always.
Maybe because I was too comfortable.
The comfort of him.
Giving his opinion.
Being unsubtle.
Tried to make me laugh.
But know enough to let me solve my own problems.
It's not like other people didn't know.
But Amir.
Amir knows the most.
And sometimes I even think he knows more.

Because in the end,
Even if it is problem,
Or happiness,
Sadness,
Guilt,
Depression,
Anger,
Or sometimes uncontrollable wrath and rage,
I will find myself searching for him,
My other half,
My best friend,
Amir bin Ibrahim. 

And sometimes it scared me,
That I will have to be independent,
Away from him,
I'd lost the comfort,
It is not the same,
Other people.
Even my own beau.
I am sorry,
But I don't think I can open up to other people,
As much as I opened up myself to him.
And up until now,
I don't know how or why,
He has the different kind of affection towards me,
Probably because of his words,
Never sugarcoats anything.
Relaxed,
Soothing words,
Without even meaning to console me.

What if one day I will lose this comfort?

I will lose you to someone else?

It is scary, more than any problems in this world combined.

I don't want to face that day when it comes.

Friends? Or Foe?

Ego.
Everyone has ego.
Even the smallest, tiniest bit of it.

But there is one type of ego,
That is just abominable to the people surrounding it.

Why do people hurts everyone around them?
And me?
Am I bound to be everybody's scapegoat?
Forever?

I asked to help.
To make your work easier.
Nope.
Your ego forbade it.
Then, 
The next thing I know,
You dragged me down to the pit of hell.
I swear to God I will never forgive you if I have to re-do the assignment.

And her.
Why is it she always have the need to be the small little devil into people's relationship?
She really does like seeing other people's friendship fallen apart,
Does she?
I am mad enough at her.
Do not provoke me.
I am not that stupid to be your puppet.
Thank God for my introvert behavior.

I am not anyone's puppet.
I have had enough.
Having whims on all of your fucking behalves.
All of you.
I want to go back,
Where it was just me,
Me alone,
Me in my own world.

Because when I open up the door to my world,
They came with various purposes.
To hurt,
To abandon,
To stab you in the back and leave your body lifeless. 

thanks for the memories

thanks for teaching me how evil humans can be

The Fault In Our Stars

" Getting hurt in this world is inevitable, but we do get to choose who we allow to hurt us." - Augustus Waters

I chose to stop pining.
I chose to stop hurting myself.
I chose to stop being alone.
I chose to step out of these webs of darkness.
But I also chose to close my eyes,
See nothing,
Hear nothing,
Say nothing.

Two Broken Pieces

He is insecure 
While she is broken. 

He has self-esteem problem 
While she is depressed. 

He comforts her 
While she tries to lift his spirit up. 

They are not perfect. 
Their flaws complete each other. 
He tries to be understanding. 
She tries to keep up. 
He tries to mend her broken heart. 
She tries to be the best for him. 

Incompletion. 
But they try. 
At least they try.